Babies Make Championship Bid In Beginning Of Forth Month Press Release

By Tim Smith

The Pata Honda World Superbike team are currently testing the one-year-old product’s of Jonathan Rea’s and Leon Haslam’s testicles on their CBR1000RR SP racing superbikes.

Yes they are.

No, really, they are.

Uh, hu.

They are too.

See, there’s pictures and everything:

The one on the left appears to have hit the 'sauce'.

The one on the left appears to have hit the ‘sauce’.

There’s even quotes:

Leon Haslam – It’ll be interesting to see if young Max has got it. The ‘rocket’ that is, which is coincidentally what me and my dad have on our salad when it’s in season. I reckon he’ll be fast though –he’s got a bit of a weight advantage.

Jonathan Rea – Jake was born a month or two after Max but we’ve been weening him on Manx kippers to build up his strength. He had a wee go on my CRF450R motocrosser on the Isle of Man, so I had to clean up the seat after, but he’ll be right.

Look, they done a funny. Actually, the rocket bit is quite funny.

I just don't think the one on the right is really it.

The One on the right has Definitely shat his nappy.

And it’s not just the riders. There’s even a ‘Youth Development Manager’. Get your seeing gear ’round this quote:

Pieter Breddels -youth development manager – With world championship racers seemingly getting younger every year – just like policemen, really – we’ve decided that we need to start investing in youth. Jonathan’s father raced and won a TT and Leon’s dad was pretty handy, too, so it absolutely HAS to be a genetic thing. If it’s not, we’re going to look a bit silly, but the lads will have had some fun.

Heh, heh. ‘Just like policemen’.

Fair play. At least they didn’t break character, unlike Citroen, who, at the end of the press release for the  C4 Cactus Arsenal Edition, needed to point this out: ‘This light-hearted story was created to demonstrate the potential for personalisation of the New C4 Cactus’.



A light hearted story, earlier today.

IT’S A JOKE. GET IT? But also, buy a Citroen Cactus. We really need the money.







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